My Friend, N

Many of you who receive our newsletters will remember my friend that I call "N." In our last newsletter I told you that we had a strong friendship and that I was thrilled that she was allowing me the opportunity to share in her life. I also mentioned that she had been married before but was divorced, and that this is a very shameful & embarrassing thing in her culture. 

One time when she was visiting with me, N told me that she might be getting married again. She was telling me what she knew of the guy (which isn't much!) and asking me what I thought. She told me that she was told that he didn't have "a very beautiful face." She didn't like the idea of marrying a guy that wasn't known as being handsome. I was able to encourage her and share that I didn't think that was the most important thing to look for in a husband. I told her she should find out if he had a beautiful heart, and that if he did, his face wouldn't matter quite as much. 

 

A few weeks later, we went for a visit in the village. When we got there, there was a lot of excitement, and they told us that N might be getting engaged soon. She was in town, buying new clothes, etc. When she got home, she was radiant. She was so excited to show me the new things she bought and to show me her hair, which she had dyed from its usual black to look like mine! (talk about a compliment!) All of the sudden, there was a lot of commotion in the house. I didn't exactly understand what was going on, but was asked to iron her clothes and help her get ready. Finally, I understood that this possible groom and his family were coming to the village. I was asked to come into the living room and help entertain the future mother-in-law. You know, when you don't know what else to talk about, bring it the foreigner. :)

I could tell we were waiting for something as we sat and visited for about an hour, but I didn't know what. Someone came in the house and said something that I didn't understand, and my friend quickly went to her room and covered her head and hair. Then she went in another room and closed the door. Shortly there after, a young man went in the room and closed the door. He was the suitor, and this was their first time to meet! They stayed in the room and talked for about 30 minutes. Then, her father went into the room, and the guy came out. As I understand it, this was her chance to tell her father whether or not she wanted to marry him (now that she knows him so well, after that 30 min conversation!). When they came out, it was settled. They are engaged, and actually considered married even though she won't go to live with him until after the wedding celebration in Aug. 

It was such a blessing to get to be there with her for such a life-changing event. She was so excited and told me that she had taken my advice. "He has a good heart" she said. 

I am so thankful to Dad for this relationship. It has taught me so much about the local culture, helped my Arabic immensely, and is such a reminder of why we are here. Ask that he would allow me to continue to speak into her life and share "the most important things" with her. Ask that he would soften her heart to hear as He has already softened her heart towards me. 

P.S. I'm hoping to post a picture soon, but I don't have any pics of us where she is covered. It would be inappropriate to post a pic of her uncovered.